Psalm 37:24 though he may stumble, he will not fall, for the Lord upholds him with his hand.
I live in a country where there are lots of mini forests because plants grown are not often pruned and looked after. They eventually grow wild and become bushes. I liken that to the upbringing of certain individuals, not straightened when they were younger or maybe abandoned, end up not being the best people to co exist with-
In our usual chit chats, my peers will often say to me, “but he doesn’t even realize there’s a problem”, “ why should I be the only one praying?”. My answer is always, “there wouldn’t be any battle if he was on the same page with you”- the reason it is called battle-.We are always told to trust God and wait.. but what do you do in the period of the wait? – “work on yourself”.
A number of women have abandoned their purposes and God given assignments on earth only for men who don’t even appreciate them. One thing I’ve grown to understand- when you’re in God’s will, everything falls in place-including your family life.
This scripture is so true, “ When a man’s ways please the Lord, he maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him”. (Proverbs 16:7)
We live in a culture where everyone’s opinion, view and assessment of marriage varies. The man’s extended family naturally feel superior to the woman- my observation. Women need to work extra hard to gain that respect. A mother in law told her daughter in law, “ you’re lucky to have my son, look after him well else you loose him to another woman”. What about her? Is he not lucky to have her too? The number of women who cringe at the thought of their mothers in law. It’s an ongoing battle and we need to be the change we want to see, otherwise, the cycle continues.
Boys are always said to be their mothers’ pets and they grow up hooked to their mothers apron strings. If we continue to empower women without changing the attitude of the men then the debate of gender equality must be revisited.
Equal? Yes! Maybe in the working environment. What about in the home?
Women naturally see the home and the children as their responsibility. When a husband gets upset at home, he picks up his car keys and he leaves the house, what about the woman? It wouldn’t even cross her mind to leave because she knows her children need her.
Work harder on yourself as a woman by taking back your dream and making it a reality. In doing so, a man automatically respects you. Don’t bring up your daughters to think that it’s okay for a man to lord over a woman. There should be mutual respect. We are taught to give praise and admiration to our men, it’s very important to do that but that should always be done from an honest point of view. Ask yourself, “am I praising him so that he will do it again?” That is manipulation. Every now and then when your husband shows kindness, it’s okay to praise but check your motive. Commit his actions into the Lord’s hands and trust God to direct him. It gets tiring having to urge someone on all the time.. When you allow them to be themselves, you wouldn’t explode when things don’t turn out the way you want them to. With a little patience, put your faith(the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen Hebrews 11:1) into action, trusting that all things will work together for your good because you love the Lord(Romans 8:28).
You’re not alone, nobody has a perfect life, when you feel overburdened by life, marriage and it’s issues, remember every one has something that they are dealing with. Marriage wasn’t meant to make us happy but to keep us Holy. I read an article sometime ago, that made mention of the egg, carrot and coffee beans in comparison with human beings and how we handle the issues of life . In an experiment, the carrot, egg and coffee beans in different boiling pots of water reacted differently. The carrot, though naturally tough in nature, softened when boiled. The egg’s shell remained the same but it’s inner fragility was lost and became hardened. The coffee on the other hand, changed the hot water, the very substance that heated it, thus bringing it pain, made it more fragrant and brought out the flavor in it.
Are you the carrot, when faced by adversity, seems tough but looses it’s strength, or like the egg, did you start out with a soft heart that hardened up after a trial? Do you look the same on the outside, but have become cold and bitter within? Or, have you chosen to be like the coffee beans who rather releases it’s beautiful smell and flavor when adversity hits it?
There’s something that everyone is dealing with. For some, it’s health issues, for others, it’s a marriage on the brink of divorce, work problems and what have you. Human beings are wired such that we face storms from time to time. That is how we build inner strength. It’s like infections, the more you get them, the more you build resistance.
Look at adversity from a different angle.If you have the right perspective and you see things the way God sees it, you bounce back quickly and come out better not bitter.
Do not be emotional, letting your emotions remove you from the will of God.
To be resilient, you must force yourself to see God- He is the known in the unknown.
Stay Blessed as always.